Wig Alert! (and other compliments)

Wig Alert!
I was walking down this kind of funky street in the city where I live, and as I passed a group of teens (why is it always teens!), they started to yell, WIG ALERT! WIG ALERT!  I ignored them, but they followed me for about a block, saying things like "do you think its alive"?  "I wonder what he feeds it".  "Do you think its on backwards"?  "Maybe he doesnt know its up there".

Compliments
1) Passing a nicely dressed guy on the street, as we pass he  says, "Nice rug, man"

2) walking down the steps in a train station, a guy coming up the steps says, "Oh, THATS undetectable"

Is that a toupee??

While visiting London I was riding on  the lower level of a doubledecker bus.  A bunch of about 8 teens came down the little stairway from the upper deck. As soon as the first one saw me he turned and said something to the others.  They all came and stood just over me, and the first one said, "IS THAT A TOUPEE"?  I ignored him.  He asked it again, louder.  People were looking.  I pretended not to notice (here the hearing aids come in handy), hoping no one would know it was me. He and some of the others kept asking, "IS THAT A TOUPEE"?  Finally I got off the bus!

Fine Art

One day in the early '90s, I worked late.  About 8 PM I left the office and went nearby to a Rustler Steak House and had the salad bar for dinner.  I still had my tie on.  As I was eating I noticed a table with 3 young guys eating and laughing a lot.  After while they got up and left, and as they passed by my table, one of them dropped a paper napkin on my table.  I thought that was really rude.  They went on out.  Then I noticed something written on the napkin. I picked it up.  On the small folded part was written "MR. NECKTIE", with a drawing of a smiley face and a tie.  Well, I thought, thats kind of cute.  Then I opened up the napkin,and inside was this elaborate drawing of big curly hair and the words, "THE WIG KING".  I looked outside, and the 3 guys were standing out there watching me, very amused.